You Must Be Yooper If ...
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| ...the beer you had for breakfast wasn't bad, so you had one more for dessert. |
| a crick is something you cool your pop in at camp, not something in your neck |
| all the bluffs (hills) around town had names. |
| as a kid you thought you'd never get out of the UP and as an adult you want to stay forever. |
| as a preteen you thought driving from Houghton to Marquette was torture and your parents wondered why you were not excited about driving to Disney World. |
| At the age of eight you could spend all day at the playgrounds and your parents never worried about you. |
| blaze orange is worn all winter....not just during hunting season. |
| choppers ain't just for for chewing |
| coming home from MSU, before the Big Mac, you waited in line for the ferry and when reaching the UP, you stopped at Miller's Road House , or stopped for a pasty, thankful you were home again. |
| Erpo and Toivo are your neighbors |
| every couple of years your bus would get stuck in the snow on the way to school. |
| If you have known people your whole life and you don't know their real name. You only know them by their nickname. |
| if your on your way to a packer game and the sign says iron mt.stay right. greenbay left so you turn around and go home |
| if your shoes don't match |
| in school they made you take a water safety class where you jumped into a pool with a snowsuit on in case your snowmobile ever went through the ice |
| it was normal to wear a winter jacket, hat, and mittens to a track meet |
| Menominee is your idea of heading south |
| My Mother would say---"You'll spoil your pasty if you put catsup on it." |
| No matter where you now live, if born in Yooperland, it will always be home. |
| pastys are eaten not worn. |
| Saturday night was considered "sauna night and coffee" while watching Lawrence Welk |
| Someone asks you where you and from and you make a map with your hands |
| spent a long lazy day lake fishing on Superior and when you needed a cool drink you just dipped the cup over the side...refreshingly cool stuff.... |
| The books in your locker got waterlogged all the time from your wet boots |
| the Chicago & Northwestern Railroad was the cheapest transportation to Milwaukee, Chicago and points south. |
| the difference between "Uptown" and "Downtown" has nothing to do with direction. It only depends on whether you turn left or right at the corner |
| the first accessory you buy for your brand new Cadillac is a "Say ya to da UP eh!" bumper sticker |
| the four seasons are Spring, Summer, Cold, and Flu |
| the National, A&P and Piggly Wiggly were "the" supermarkets back in the day. |
| The only bridge I ever want to burn is the Mackinaw Bridge on my way home |
| the only proper way to eat a pasty is with ketchup. |
| the roads are wider in the winter than they are in the summer |
| the UP is so far north I had to walk south to see the "Northern Lights".!! |
| the yearly ski tournament at Ishpeming's Suicide Hill was as big a draw as any other sporting event. |
| there are as many Packer-backers in your family as Lions fans. |
| there hasn’t been a murder in your town in well over 50 years |
| There were guys on the football team in high school who would play in the band half time show with their football gear on |
| they had to snow blow the football field before the game started. |
| using a "Scoop" has nothing to do with serving Ice Cream |
| websites that show competing airline fares are of no use to you because only Northwest flies to your town |
| when traveling you tell someone that you have a sauna in your house and they think you are rich. |
| when you go out of town, you fill your trunk full of GOOD pastys |
| when you have an old tshirt for a gas cap or eat chili on cold morning before school you have shovled 3 feet of partly cloudy |
| when you sit in an electric sauna in a sports club something just seems wrong. |
| When you were a kid you wanted "snowmobile boots" even though you didn't have a snowmobile |
| whenever you travel people try to correct the way you pronounce sauna or they ask you what is a sauna |
| you actually did walk through 10' of snow to get to school. |
| you actually know what a chook is eh |
| you actually LIKE to swim in Lake Superior! |
| You actually USED a carpet-beater to beat the dust from a rug over the clothes-line. |
| you anxiously await and then read the Yooper Newsletter (in detail) each week. |
| you are appalled at anyone who would even think to put gravy on their pasty. |
| You are at the airport in Milwaukee for a flight home to Escanaba and someone asks if they have a window or an aisle seat on the same flight? They answer both, they look bewildered! |
| you are disappointed with your new home because the front porch only holds two cords of wood. |
| you built a snowman in your yard in June. |
| you can remember being on a flying saucer and your Dad pulling you behind the car on the way to Camp Lake to visit Grandma and Grandpa Johnson |
| you can smell spring before you can see it. |
| you clearly remember the smell of cigarette smoke, hot dogs, cocoa, and hockey equipment at the local ice rink |
| you come home to the UP for a visit and take home fresh pizza from Riverside Cafe in Iron River. And live in Florida |
| you consider eating the jalapeno's and cauliflower with your pickled egg as fulfilling your daily vegetable intake |
| you consider the Mosquito to be your State bird, & winters are 6 months of good snow, 6 months of tough sledding. |
| You couldn't go skiing without choppers because of the rope tow. |
| you decorate your home with firearms and have deer heads on the wall to prove you can shoot straight. |
| you didn't back-talk a cop, teacher, or anyone's Mom or Dad. |
| you didn't believe your teacher when she told you "pank" is not a real word in the dictionary. |
| you didn't have a Finnish last name, you were a minority. |
| you didn't notice anything unusual about Bob and Doug McKenzie's accent when you saw Strange Brew. |
| you drive faster in the winter then in summer cause the pot holes are full of snow |
| you drove your snow mobile to a wedding. |
| you earned a quarter shoveling the neighbors' paths and driveways after a heavy snow. |
| You enjoyed the taste of Gilt Edge and Sauna Beer |
| you ever swam in, and then later caught a musky from the same abandoned mine pit. |
| you give your dog a bath in Lake Superior and then take one yourself. |
| you go out to fish fry every Friday |
| you go skinny dipping in ponds.. |
| you go to town shopping in a blizzard |
| you had the same drivers education instructor that your mother had 23 years ago. |
| You had to snowshoe to your favorite "Brookie" hole on opening day of Trout season. |
| you had to wear a snowsuit under your Halloween costume. |
| you had your first beer when you were 10 years old. |
| you had your first panic attack at age 7 when your snow suit sipper jammed and you really had to go to the bathroom BAD. |
| you have a "good" flannel, you know, the one you wear to wedding receptions. |
| you have been to Elo and knew you were in Elo, many times. |
| you have ever took the jump off the Black River Park river bridge. |
| you have jumper cables and a tug em strap in your car and know how to use them |
| you have seen a carpet loom in action |
| you have spent a hot summer day with a pile of firewood and a splitting maul |
| you have used charcoal for grillin and to start your car in the winter .
{lay it out on a cookie sheet and place under oil pan to heat engine} |
| you have used the heater, the A/C, and the heater again in one day, while going fishin' |
| you have worn shorts at 50 degrees with a sweatshirt. |
| you hitchhiked out to the lake to swim at 10 years old. |
| you hooked a car bumper on the way to school....and home again.... |
| you keep a hair dryer in your garage to thaw out parts on your snowblower. |
| you kill a deer fly and a 1000 more come to its funeral |
| you knew what road pops were |
| you know a guy named "Potsy that wasn't on Happy Days. |
| you know how to spell and pronounce Tahquamenon. |
| you know store bought blueberries don't taste like real blueberries |
| you know that Calumet was given consideration as the State Capital |
| you know that Ironwood, Michigan is farther West than St. Louis, Missouri. |
| You know the feeling of having your eyelids freeze shut. |
| you know there are two seasons of the year: winter and the Fourth of July! |
| you know what a Bosch mini case was back in the 70's
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| You know what a road trip is |
| you know what a stormy kromer is |
| you know what a "Coffee Royal" is and you've had one for breakfast. |
| You know what candles are in the winter. |
| you know what Deep Woods Off tastes like. |
| You know what it means to "shoot" a six-pack of Schlitz mini-malts |
| you know what native brook trout tastes like |
| you know what pasties, cudighi, and potato sausage are. |
| you know what Sauna Company is |
| you know what shackin' is |
| you know what the word "pank" means... |
| you know what "spring peepers" are and look forward to hearing them every spring. |
| you know what "the cow path" is... |
| you know what 'swampers' are |
| you know where Ontonagon, Lanse, Allouez, & Bette Gris are, & can pronounce them correctly |
| you know "White Pine is more than just a town. |
| you laugh when the weatherman in another state says the snowstorm there is so bad that the snow drifts are almost up to his knees. |
| you never got to drive on a road with a real stoplight during drivers training. |
| you own three different kinds of skis and two different kinds of snowshoes. |
| you pass a R/R Sign and you think you are comming into Ruces Rossing |
| you pay your bills with rahaa. |
| you played a game of pool for lunch at "Rockys" |
| You played road hockey on a snow covered road with a real puck |
| you put on shorts in the morning and then had to change to sweats by noon. |
| you refer a 32 ounce bottle of beer as a "jumbo". |
| you remember drinking milk from Copper Country Dairy |
| you remember lying on your back in a snowbank and letting the flakes come down and land on your face while time ticked slowly by. |
| you remember swimming at Greysands |
| you remember the huge level of excitement when McDonalds came to town and how you had to wait in line for 30 minutes to place your order even after 4 months. |
| you remember when the closest traffic light and McDonalds to Hancock was in Marquette. |
| you remember when the roller rink was a Saturday night out in Marquette |
| you remember when you had to decide between Pat's and Kemp's to do your shopping. |
| you remember working underground in a mine. |
| You said "Let's go do Moby Dick" (swim out and use the big tree trunk that once floated all around the lake at Ishpeming's Cedar Beach as a "raft") |
| you say Ya to answer someone. |
| you say "sauna" and the trolls think you are talking about a female pig while
using a fake Italian accent. |
| you shot your first shot gun in 6th grade it was part of the school curriculum for boys and girls. |
| you shoveled snow in the morning before going to school and again when you came home. |
| you sing along to "Rusty Chevrolet" |
| you sit on a penkki in the sauna and use a kauha to get water. When you go for a sauna at someone elses house you put your towels and clean clothes in your sauna pussi. |
| you smoked your first cigarette and your parents knew about it before you got home. |
| you still hear people say "let's go mall," or "do you want to go Green Bay?" |
| you stood on your frozen holloween pumpkins to put up your christmas decorations |
| you stop and take a deep breath after crossing the Big Mac to the U.P. |
| you swam bare-butt at "Rocky," the west end of Cedar Lake. |
| you think 19 feet of snow was a mild winter. |
| you think that landscaping your yard is mowing the lawn. |
| you think the first day of deer season is a national holiday. |
| you think the four season are June, July, August, and Winter |
| You thought it was more "cool" to wear long johns than snow pants in elementary school |
| You thought Jack Frost was a real person and he was going to bite your nose off because your grandma told you so |
| you thought tourists dressed weird, and then 2 years later you were wearing the same clothes they were. |
| you thought you were real smart cause you knew what Aurora Borealis meant, and you had seen it. |
| you tipped your canoe in Lake Superior and thought you were going into hypothermia, but then after you went numb, you changed your mind and swam the canoe back to shore and kept swimming for fun |
| you took a Sauna every Saturday night |
| you took your dog into Chicaugoan Lake with a bar of Fels Naptha soap to wash the skunk smell off of him. |
| you watched Steve Mariucci play football and Tom Izzo play basketball
you ate Bunny Bread |
| you watched "Finland Calling" with Carl Pelonpaa on Sunday Mornings on TV on Sunday mornings. |
| you wave to passers by, while driving or walking, for no reason. |
| You went as an exchange student to the Detroit area. |
| you went out behind your house to get your Christmas tree |
| you wish that Saddam tried to hide in the UP |
| You wished your high school was one of the "rich" schools that had a pool |
| you wore a parka to watch fireworks on the 4th of July. |
| you "pank" down the snow instead of tamp it like those others do.....
but make sure you put your "chook" on before weathering that cold. |
| your back porch serves as a refrigerator for half the year |
| Your grandma told you to wear your chook even when it was 50 degrees outside |
| your ice shack/deer blind has better amenities than your home |
| your last word in a sentence is, "hea" |
| your outdoor toilet has a sign, "Woods National Bank, Make deposits here but don't leave the change on the counter" |
| your outhouse has a Sears catalog for toilet paper |
| your parents spoke Finnish when they didn't want you to hear what they were talking about |
| your Sunday drive consists of taking the back roads to Republic. |
| your tongue got stuck to the metal zipper on your snowsuit when you were a kid. |
| your weather gauge is a piece of rope |
| your wife's Lady Remington is a 30-06. |
| You'd take a shower after your sport and when you went outside you hair froze solid |
| you're a Yooper transplant and live "down below", you're driving north on the Big Mac and you roll down your window, take a deep breath and say Ahhhh, I'm home! |
| you're lucky Summer falls on a Saturday |
| you've ever eaten a pasty for breakfast. |
| you've gone out with your parents on a hot summer day to "make wood." |
| you've gotten squeaky clean in a Sauna that had no running water just a big barrel of cold water, a hot water reservoir attached to the wood stove, and some enamel dishpans. |
| you've often went sledding with a wooden toboggan with metal runners. |
| You've taken a digger. |
| You've traveled at least 5 hours to go to a "good" hospital |
| you've traveled at least two hours to see a doctor. |
| You've "buzzed the gut". |